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How to handle failures ?

2

Comments

  • One size fits all approach doesn't work in life. Kisi k liye family first hai career second. Usko agar aap bologe ki get a job if u want to clear civils, then it's not gonna work.
    Age advance hota hai to family zyada important hoti hai not a job.

    Often we try to rationalize the exam strategy. Lemme tell you, it's predictably irrational. A job cannot give one a guarantee that one's gonna clear civils. There are thousands of examples where people failed to clear despite being in a job.

    The bitter truth is, this is a competitive exam with only 1000-1500 seats. So maximum junta will fail. And those who are pursuing this exam without a job know this fact very well. They have quit well-paying jobs despite all the risk involved. So telling them to get a job is like stating the obvious.

    No offence to anyone.
  • I have decided 3 things if I fail in all my attempts.

    1. I won't marry.
    2. I may get a tattoo saying 'Loser'.
    3. Complete cut-off from friends and relatives.

    Go hell with the world. BC.
    I should not laugh here but after reading your comment i laughed hard.
    But tbh those 3 decisions are evil don't take it for God's sake
  • I have decided 3 things if I fail in all my attempts.

    1. I won't marry.
    2. I may get a tattoo saying 'Loser'.
    3. Complete cut-off from friends and relatives.

    Go hell with the world. BC.
    i like your idea , i also wanted to be a criminal , now upsc is allowing me to do after all my attempts , i will go and join isis
  • Idea bura nhi hai..IAS nhi to Is
  • One size fits all approach doesn't work in life. Kisi k liye family first hai career second. Usko agar aap bologe ki get a job if u want to clear civils, then it's not gonna work.
    Age advance hota hai to family zyada important hoti hai not a job.

    Often we try to rationalize the exam strategy. Lemme tell you, it's predictably irrational. A job cannot give one a guarantee that one's gonna clear civils. There are thousands of examples where people failed to clear despite being in a job.

    The bitter truth is, this is a competitive exam with only 1000-1500 seats. So maximum junta will fail. And those who are pursuing this exam without a job know this fact very well. They have quit well-paying jobs despite all the risk involved. So telling them to get a job is like stating the obvious.

    No offence to anyone.
    I agree. Most of us have already left the well-paying jobs and even didn't join the much sought after so called prestigious government jobs. Sometimes, its all about dreams. You want to fulfill those dreams before you enter the another phase of your life. Perhaps i can't explain it, don't even want to explain. Not at all in a mood to get trolled.

    And yes, One size never fits all!
  • Mourn. It's ok to mourn.Take your time.
    Do not jump to conclusions about yourself. Do not try to be too deterministic about what happened or what could have happened had you done something else. Simply, allow the sorrow to come out.
    It happened. Its ok. sometimes things don't turn out the way we want them to be despite the best efforts.
    we are all in this together, nobody has complete information to make the best decisions, everything is a matter of probability and we all swim in the sea of unknown.
    Slowly, in the wink of a moment you will learn to see yourself for who you are.
    You will detach yourself from your desire for what could have happened, to what can happen now .
    you will, and you will learn to look at yourself objectively, without worrying about what others think about you.
    Go out in nature. Not because poets said so.
    But because when we are in our room , we are influenced by what our roommate our our family would think about us.
    But out in the company of trees, far from the world, we have the privilege to care about what only we think about ourselves.
    Go out , wander , relax , jump , spend some time with yourself , to reinforce your belief system.
    We all have these stories in our minds , which we tell ourselves, which we tell others, about who we are and why we want what we want.
    Man is essentially a story teller.
    What is your story? whatever it is, it is unique .The stories we tell ourselves, form our notion of our identities. Many stories. A fabulous painter, a loyal friend, a quick witted jester, a politics enthusiast , a hardworking student, an occasional failure. Ouch.
    we allow this failure to be overarching over all the things that make us who we are. In our flood of sorrow, we allow it to subsume everything and twist our story of us.
    Ask yourself , is it the complete story?
    No, its not. Game is not over yet. Failure is just a phase.
    Human spirit has the capacity to face many setbacks , and yet it has the grit to bounce back .
    Just learn to nurture it , with a very honest , balanced , and less cynical story of who you are, and,
    why you are doing what you are doing. That's it , your allegiance to your own self, no one else.
    And retell yourself this story, again and again and again , because we are humans, and we tend to get disheartened when we want something really bad. But that is the beauty of any struggle. It is like having to clean to the room , again and again, because thanks to entropy, the law of nature , everything just goes against our perfect idea of how things should turn out to be , into an inevitable disorder.

    Learn to live with this disorder.

    "What comes, will go.
    What is found will be lost again.
    But what you are is beyond coming and going and beyond description.

    You are it."
    -Rumi

    https://youtube.com/watch?v=EBUTQkaSSTY&index=3&list=PLwxNMb28XmpeUL1vz9Su7OmeghBDgmj7X
  • @zazen take a bow man. Great inspiring words full of wisdom.
  • Brother my advice is: dont seek solace in philosophy and others' "sad" journey.
    Better get down to work and do the boring repetitive drill of reading and re reading. We usually try to skip this monotonous and boring stuff but this is the way. Dont look for inspiration or motivation.
  • edited September 2016
    @zazen amidst all this chaos of result, exam, failure this write up of yours worked as a wonder! I mean seriously i read it four times. Will read it again.

    I might sound weird but i realized after reading it that perhaps right now so as to calm myself all i need is some good book. May be some all time favourite classic! Thanks buddy. Keep writing.

    No "like" option, hence commented. :)
  • @ zazen amidst all this chaos of result, exam, failure this write up of yours worked as a wonder! I mean seriously i read it four times. Will read it again.

    I might sound weird but i realized after reading it that perhaps right now so as to calm myself all i need is some good book. May be some all time favourite classic! Thanks buddy. Keep writing.

    No "like" option, hence commented. :)
    Jane Eyre.
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